Gina Rose


April 25th, 2008  a Friday

(This entry contains material that may be objectionable to some.  Read at your own risk.)

I am sure you know exactly how old you are.  Maybe you are worrying about your age.  Most people do no matter how old they are, for different reasons.  But that's the thing about being a bear.  You don't even really know exactly how old you are.  Is it like dog years where one year on earth counts for 7?  (So Jilly the Coyote Dog is really 91 years old.)  Or is it just like people years (even though my fur seems to get mashed up and faded faster than skin gets wrinkled)?  Maybe I should invent teddy bear years.  Since bears can live for a long, long time scanning many generations, it would probably be something like one year for every 14.  But since teddy bears rarely know when or how they were born, how would you even begin to calculate?  Maybe we can use our bear intuition to kinda imagine how old we are but then how would you know if that number was influenced by how old we want to be?  Oh well, I digress.   

There is a book called the Sage's Tao Te Ching, Ancient Advice for the Second Half of Life.  (OK, I am going to assume I may be in the second half of my life for purposes of today's blog.)  It is a small book, pale green, with a tiny picture on the cover of a beautiful old tree in a field with pretty clouds in the sky.  I think we sages are supposed to be like that tree, you know.  It is the kind of book you go back to over and over because depending on what you are going through, you always find something that applies and how you can be sage about it.  (Don't you love how sage is used as both a noun and an adjective?) 

Lately I have been feeling it might be better for me to let go of some things I have really cared about a lot.  But then I got confused as to whether that would mean I don't care any more or I could still care but just have a little less death grip on those things.  So I went to the sage book for advice and found the following:  "It is all right to loosen your hold on things, to care less about some things, and more about others.  You don't have to cling to your images of yourself."  That seems like permission to let go without it feeling like a bad thing.  I'm going with it.

So if the Suns really do lose to San Antonio again and don't win the championship, I'll be ok with that.  Yeah, I'll be sad if that happens but it won't crush me.  That doesn't mean that I'm not a believer or that I have lost my loyalty to the boys because those are my best qualities.  I am just going to let go a little in my heart and accept whatever happens.  (See how easy this sage stuff is?)

Another sign of sageness is when you can witness those who are still young, and "generating heat and energy like the noonday sun" (that's from the book) and accept them for what they are.  You are supposed to observe with a "detached serenity", speak with "gentle, helpful and few words", and know that silence is as "beautiful as the Harvest moon".  Well, this is one bear that isn't quite that sage yet.

This morning I was going to watch a little political news on early morning tv and while waiting for the channel to change, caught part of an infomercial on the sports station.  The product was ExtenZe.  You can imagine what it does.  Think male and bigger.  There was a really slutty girl acting as hostess with a mike she carried everywhere that said sex-tv on it.  First she went out on the street to interview "random" couples and what was really amazing is that every guy she ran into actually used this product and loved it.  In all cases, the girlfriend was acting overly excited about how great he was in bed now.  The first really bad moment came when at the end of the street interview, the girlfriend went one step too far and said that if he stopped using ExtenZe, she wouldn't stay with him.  He went from paid macho mouthpiece to crushed boyfriend right in front of our eyes.  It was painful to watch.  Then they interviewed a group of women who excitedly told the girl clutching the mike how important size was and how much sex mattered.  They all spoke of former boyfriends who just didn't measure up size wise so they had to leave those guys since they just weren't able to cut it.  One even said her inadequate former boyfriend was a big, strong athlete and the other lady said that she must have dated his "brother", followed by velvety, knowing laughter that can only be shared by women talking about sex.  A guy just can't be too big, they said, big is good.  One said her fiance takes ExtenZe and it's always Christmas at her house!  They left no doubt that size was required, not preferred.  The best part is that you can try it and if you don't grow, it costs you nothing.

Now sorry if I offended anyone by bringing this up but I was pretty offended seeing it on tv.  Not because it was about sex, but offended at how awful these women are to judge their relationships with their boyfriends based on their "size".  I have been defending women against all the injustices done to them by men my whole bear life and more than once quoted an Italian waiter in Coronado who used to say "men are dogs".  But I have to defend these poor guys now.  Just wait until these women hit sage age and their sex parts don't look so attractive anymore and they have maxed out on plastic surgery.  Just wait til they have kids and then say hello to menopause.  These men they taught to be size enhanced in order to be good boyfriend material will be looking for the younger version of their wives and still taking ExtenZe and whatever other products are raking in billions.   By then it will be too late for these women to transition into the sage stuff.  Wake up, ladies.  You are now doing to men what we have complained they have always done to us.  Is this your idea of equality? 

OK.  There, I 've said it.  Just my opinon.  I am going to go back to being sage now.  Ssssssshhhhhh for the rest of the day.

GR